Since having Rium, I’ve received comments on mostly my looks, but “aura?” too. From “You don’t look like you just had a baby!” to “You’re doing so well.” Here’s the truth… and let’s break it down.
Listen to the Life Podcast episode here.
Body Weight and Food
Truth is, I’m slightly under the weight that I was pre-pregnancy. I just don’t look like it. I was a lot more “plump” before, which you can tell around my face or arms. So when I hear everyone’s reactions, it makes me laugh. This is because I didn’t notice that much of a difference until more people talked to me about my body image. I’m also not someone who talks about body image, so being talked to about it made me wonder. While I may look like I’ve lost weight, I haven’t compared to pre-pregnancy.
A few quick answers to several questions — No, I’m not taking medication. No, I’m not eating differently (diet wise). No, I’m not eating less. Simply, I’m putting in the work to understand my body.
Having been pregnant before, I knew I’d want to keep my figure after having my baby. I was leaner after I had my daughter and I knew I would be too after having my son. I learned from the first time how my body would react to pregnancy and postpartum. Knowing what I knew, I planned accordingly.
First, that one-month postpartum chicken diet did some work. Did I continue to eat chicken after my first month? Yes, only because I needed freezer space for breastmilk. Although it wasn’t all that I ate, it still contributed to my leaner look. Second, I’m breastfeeding. That means I’m losing a lot more calories (and gaining more stress) than the usual day to day non-postpartum me. Third, I’m working out more frequently like running and lifting, which helps to keep my body toned. Finally, I give myself lymphatic drainage massages weekly. This redirects and flushes out excess fluid, losing that “plump” look that I mentioned earlier.
Since having my son, however, I have lost ten pounds. This is me shedding that pregnancy weight. Do I have goals to continue losing weight? Sure. I’ll admit, I’m not the healthiest weight in my age and height category. But most importantly, I need to for my overall wellbeing. Even so, it’s not a top priority of mine to lose weight. Rather, it’s to feel good in my body and skin. Thus, leading to food.
While re-introducing foods to my diet after eating boiled chicken for a month, I was mindful of the foods and beverages I was consuming. My digestive system is on the sensitive side so I tend to react to certain foods. For example, I don’t do well with certain dairy products. I’ve learned to avoid them going forward. That doesn’t mean I won’t say yes to ice cream though (laughs). Maybe specific milk options. Instead, I opt for coconut milk. Oh, and I don’t like drinking cold water (unless I’m feeling extremely hot). That also helps everything flow smoothly. If you haven’t tried it, you should. Drink lukewarm water or hot water.
State of Mind
Like I stated earlier, I planned for what life would look like postpartum… At least to what I could control. I needed a vision, so I made one. I started implementing this vision in my third trimester to get ahead.
With my daughter, postpartum looked entirely different. I felt entirely different. Given, I’ve never been a parent before. Now I have experience. I didn’t want to have the same experiences that I had the first time, so I needed a plan – not a strict one, just some ideas.
I went to work right away. If you know me, you know I can’t sit still. I need movement of any kind. Momentum. For me, that’s work. It gives me peace and helps me to feel like myself. It’s a different kind of space from home. Also, it gave me purpose to talk to people. I can’t only talk to my partner and children (sorry, not sorry). I need community.
Before my third trimester, I picked up reading again. This time, it wasn’t a textbook (laughs). I’ve loved reading since elementary school, but I lost it over time. Last year I wanted to reconnect with my younger self. Not to mention, I needed to expand my mind. I knew books would do the trick, and it did. I had a lot of time before my son was born, so there were days when I’d finish a book a day. Crazy, right? I don’t have that much time now, but I still get in some pages when I can! It continues to help me decompress, fantasize and rest.
Physical activity keeps me going. For one, it feels good being able to check something off the list. If it’s right away in the morning? Even better. That’s usually the time I hit the gym, or get some kind of activity in (HIIT, pilates, yoga, lifting, walking, etc). Secondly, it’s scientifically proven that physical activity helps to reduce stress, improve sleep, and releases endorphins and serotonin. I can feel a significant impact on my mind and body if I haven’t had any sort of physical activity.
I try to meditate and write daily, but it’s a work in progress. Because sleep > meditation and writing (laughs). I’ll let that speak for itself. But I find that it is helpful!
Sleep… where do I begin?! Some days are easier than others. I strive for that perfect eight hour (straight) rest, but with a tiny human being, it’s tough. I track my sleep with my Garmin and RingConn daily, along with physical activity and stress management. It generates data for me to read about what’s happening in my body and what I need… which is often more than eight hours of sleep. I’ll get there again one day. For now, I’m surviving on interrupted sleep and naps. If I haven’t had enough sleep, my mood (and entire day) will feel off… and you’ll be sure to know it.
These lifestyle choices have helped to better my state of mind, which explains why I may have a peaceful aura or why I may present myself the way I do. I give myself space to do what I enjoy, to be with community, to reconnect with myself, to step back from the day to day tasks, to check in with my fitness, and to recover.
Skincare
You should already know this is probably the one thing I keep consistent if nothing else… Literally, nothing else. I’ve spent most of my life figuring out my skin and I will continue to do so. Our skin changes depending on the foods we take in, the weather, time of month, time of life, etc. Skin, to me, is my selfcare. It’s my weekly non-negotiable. If I’m crabby? I most likely haven’t done my daily or weekly regimen. I’m half kidding.
Several weeks before having my baby, I incorporated certain skincare products that I skipped during my entire pregnancy. I felt that I was far along enough in my pregnancy to start using them occasionally (not daily, some products hardly weekly). I wanted to prepare my skin for postpartum skin. Not to mention, I needed to maintain a routine. Having a set routine will help after delivery. And it did.
All I cared about after having my son was:
1) Washing my face and applying products… A shower. Some days I didn’t even care to brush my hair. Let’s be honest. It’s getting tied up.
2) Brushing my teeth
3) Feeding myself and my family
4) Keep things tidy – dishes, laundry and the living room… aka, baby items and toys.
5) Basic hygienic care for the kiddos
If I had these five accomplished daily, I was set. Nothing else was needed for and from me.
Now that I’m three months postpartum, this list has changed of course. I’ve added other skincare tools and products to the mix, like an LED mask. Similar to a body lymphatic drainage massage, I’ve maintained a weekly facial lymphatic drainage massage. I also perform a short one when applying products daily. Perhaps that’s why everyone sees such a difference in my weight “loss”. It’s great for inflammation!
Ending Notes
I’m still learning about myself. Every day is a different day and I get by as best as I can. This is my mommy makeover, but from/at home!
